They're usually pictures of mysterious, sexy-looking, beautiful women (like Marilyn Monroe) who are a little on the overweight side, with captions that say, "Remember when curvy was sexy and skinny wasn't?" or "What man wouldn't rather have this than a bag of bones?"
Nice stuff like that.
I'm getting tired of seeing them.
When I was 135 pounds overweight, when I was 45 pounds overweight, I may have been curvier than I am now. I may have had more "meat" on my bones.
But I was freaking miserable. I was a walking health risk. Every bite I took, every step I didn't take was pushing me, if not to an early grave, to a life that was not going to be fun.
My cholesterol was sky-high. I had a lower back issue that medications and physical therapy didn't help.
I most definitely didn't feel sexy or beautiful or amazing.
I guess I could be called "skinny" now. I prefer "in shape," "healthy" or "fit." I have strong legs and arms and shoulders. My blood work? Perfect. My lower back issue? Non-existent.
And while I wouldn't call myself "sexy," "beautiful" or "amazing," I am extremely happy with where I am.
(I would go into how women battle among themselves about various things (motherhood, working, weight) because they are insecure with how they are doing things, but honestly? I'm 40. I've been a mom for almost 13 years. I've been married for 17. I'm bored with that garbage.)
Here it is: I was criticized when I was overweight, and now I'm criticized when I'm in shape. It appears I can't win, but here's something new: I don't give a damn.
I wouldn't post a picture of a woman with an athletic body with a caption that reads, "Don't you wish you were like me?" or "If you got off your ass, you'd be on your way to this."
I know how difficult it is to take that first step. I know how it is to feel trapped inside your body. (I also know how it feels in your brain, in your heart.)
But I also know how glorious it feels to lose that pound. To run that mile. To be stronger than you EVER thought you'd be...
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