Today is my official weigh-in day. I usually jump on the scale (after I've peed, before I've eaten) in the morning a couple of times a week, so the 137 (!!!!) I saw this morning wasn't a huge surprise. But still -- knowing that it was 137 a few days ago and I managed to maintain that despite my daughter's sickness and some busy days at work makes me feel great!
My official goal is 130. As stated before, I will go no lower than that. I'm not sure how to maintain 130, so that will be another adventure y'all get to go on with me.
Despite the fact that I still have seven pounds to go, and the holidays are coming up, I still consider myself to be a success, to have done good.
I was a mess 24 pounds ago. A complete and utter mess. Overly cranky and grouchy. Nonchalant about my appearance. Introverted. And overweight.
Now, being those things aren't horrible, if that's how you want to be. But it has been my experience that most people don't want to be those things.
And at 137 pounds, I'm not magically this wonderful mother, wife, employee and citizen who is always happy, always perfectly dressed and always ready for a party. I don't expect I'll be 100-percent wonderful at 130, either.
I get cranky at the kids and my husband if I'm waiting on them to do something so I can run, and they're moving slowly. Most Fridays, I am wearing jeans to work and most likely no make-up, and on Saturdays and Sundays, running shorts or yoga pants, people. And I am looking forward to, after some things I have to do this morning, coming home, going for a run in the late afternoon/early evening, showering and just vegging at home.
What 137 (and later, 130) does for me is it takes away the anger at myself for my weight, my appearance. I no longer feel depressed because I can't find decent clothing in my size. It takes away one aspect of hyper-criticalness. (I, unfortunately, have PLENTY of other things to criticize myself about.) I have more energy. I'm more focused.
And that, in my book, is success.
Congrats, Beth! You now officially weigh less than I do!! I really need to work harder on my health/weight too. I've been using all the crap that's going on in my "home" life as an excuse to slow me down and feel sorry for myself, but reading your blog has helped me want to get off my ass! Thanks. =)
ReplyDeleteGirl, you should funnel all the stuff that goes on at home into exercise! Some days, when the kids and Rusty are driving me crazy (seriously, you want to BET ME that Kyle's hand isn't as big as mine?), I need to run in the WORST WAY. I do and all is good!
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